I’ve been aching to share what’s been going on with me for some time now. Each time I’ve sat down at the keyboard to try it, there’s been this problem of not being able to communicate.
This has been so frustrating to me. I’ve been feeling bereft even, as if I were someone who was a good dancer and all of a sudden can’t dance a lick.
Without wanting to sound like I’m trying to toot my own horn here, I need to share this experience I’m having, and the way that I’m having it.
My intelligence has been upgraded somehow in these last couple of months. I don’t mean only my mental intelligence either, I mean my Intelligence overall. Much of it is emotional and even more of it is intuitive, delivering absolutely stunning insights into my conscious awareness. Even my body is speaking to me and imparting some crazy intense and extremely deep wisdom.
Pardon me, while I wander around here with my mouth hanging open, but this is what’s happening pretty much everyday all day long for a while now.
The ‘evidence’ of this shift has been another interesting and also confusing conundrum in this saga. It’s been weeks and weeks of ‘knowing’ some major shifting is occurring and waiting for it to integrate enough for me to bring to consciousness what that is. (Please add in here whatever cliches are out there for patience or specifically the lack thereof!!)
All I can say is that I’ve been a student of and actively studying archetypal (4th dimensional) icons and landscapes, i.e., myths and collective consciousness framework for my entire life. This is the same juice that makes me so interested in observing and playing into the ‘group’ or collective pool of consciousness.
Somehow these new energies have brought to me downloads that have shaken the foundations of my understandings about what this archetypal landscape is all about. This has been so very paradigm breaking and literally upending my footing in my ability to communicate lately.
It’s cracked open the shell of my awareness to expand, spiraling into an expansion so extreme that is making me feel like it’s almost laughable that I couldn’t see the true meanings before now. All of a sudden, the connections are there and outlined in red, so to speak. Where were they just a few short months ago?
How will I find the way to share this? It’s not that I’ve lost my skills of language. It’s that my personal command of language is falling short of what I would consider even a minimum of touching on the new territory I’m in.
Also, I want to mention here the extreme tiredness physically. I literally wake up feeling like I’m made of cement and I have to ground myself with all my might to even get into my body enough to get on with my day. A part of me is saying, relax, ground, and accept this, and another part is calling out for some relief!
I hope to have some way to share my bounty with all of you soon. Right now it’s a challenge just to commune at all, and I’m so grateful to get over this speed bump long enough to touch base with you with this report.
This is interesting. I have been through similar experiences/knowings over the past few months. I am finding my voice through creative writing – particularly haiku and haibun. Perhaps experimenting with new forms of expression might work for you. I can relate to the tiredness too.
Thanks for your comments.
As a highly expressive and creative person I know what you’re talking about. I’ve written notebooks full of poetry, prose, and songs in my life, and I also paint portraits. I’m a terror in the kitchen as well, but all these things are still in the realm of being difficult right now to function in.
I’m feeling split in my ability to focus and having rather intensely multi-dimensional ‘bleed-throughs’ where I’m me but also some other me’s are here now with slightly different back-grounds (??). Again, there isn’t the right words for describing this current stuff, LOL! It’s really distracting to have my own life ‘stories’ dissolve before my eyes, and this is just the tip of the iceberg.
No matter. On we go, and how it ends up we already know is all about LOVE. In the meantime, the surfing is truly getting more challenging.
It is weird when you get those ‘bleed throughs’.. This is certainly a very strange time. I have a lot of crown chakra activity and spacey feelings – very strange when they come on at work and I’m in the middle of a conversation with someone – lol. As you say – it’s very distracting.
All the best with your journey and your ‘surfing’. It’s great to talk to someone else experiencing these things.